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| TED LASSO TV Series 2020. Created by Bill Lawrence, Jason Sudeikis, Brendan Hunt and Joe Kelly. Starring Jason Sudeikis, Hannah Waddingham, Jeremy Swift, Phil Dunster, Brett Goldstein, Brendan Hunt, Nick Mohammed and Juno Temple. | |||
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| 1 | Barbara  | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Barbara Barbara: Did you tell Shandy to call Emma Jayye at 4:00 in the morning, whilst drunk on "espresso martinis," to pitch her an idea for "condom for balls"? | |||||||||||
| 2 | Coach Beard | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Coach Beard Coach Beard: Man City. I can't believe our white whale has the same name as the strip club where I danced in college. | |||||||||||
| 3 | Coach Beard & Ted Lasso | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Coach Beard & Ted Lasso Coach Beard: Tonight, me and Jane have reserved an axe-throwing lane at Hatchet and Rye. You fellas care to join the festivities? Ted Lasso: Hmm. That sounds equal parts fun and dangerous. What are y'all celebrating? Coach Beard: Karma's speedy delivery of a shit sandwich to the Wonder Turd. Here, Jane made targets. | |||||||||||
| 4 | Coach Beard & Ted Lasso  | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Coach Beard & Ted Lasso Coach Beard: Change isn't about trying to be perfect. Perfection sucks. Perfect is boring. Ted Lasso: I mean, except Shawshank. That's not boring. Coach Beard: Yeah. I mean, there are perfect films. Back to the Future. Jaws. Ted Lasso: Jaws. Yeah. | |||||||||||
| 5 | Dani Rojas | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Dani Rojas Dani Rojas: I am not your bro. We are now enemies, and soon, you will be my bitch. | |||||||||||
| 6 | Danny | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Danny Danny: My face scored a goal! My face scored a goal! | |||||||||||
| 7 | Flo Collins | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Flo Collins Flo Collins: In all seriousness, I do wish you the best, because you are the fucking worst. | |||||||||||
| 8 | Henry | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Henry Henry: Be a goldfish. | |||||||||||
| 9 | None of Your Fucking Business | Medical Conditions | Conditions | ||||||||
None of Your Fucking Business Roy: I've just come down with a case of the "None of your fucking business." | |||||||||||
| 10 | Roy | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Roy Roy: I've just come down with a case of the "None of your fucking business." | |||||||||||
| 11 | Roy Kent | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Roy Kent Roy Kent: Can I be a Diamond Dog? | |||||||||||
| 12 | Shandy | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Shandy Shandy (regarding her new app Starfuckr): It's like Bantr, but it's better and cooler and actually cares about helping people have sex with celebrities. | |||||||||||
| 13 | Ted Lasso | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Ted Lasso Ted Lasso: All right, big guy. Let's get you all set up here. iPad's all loaded up with a bunch of movies, so no need to watch your neighbor's screen, okay? Less movies about clowns in sewers, the better, right? | |||||||||||
| 14 | Ted Lasso | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Ted Lasso Ted Lasso (addressing the team in the sewer): Over the summer, Henry and I took a tour of this place with Ivor here... Well, it was his idea, actually. See, what happened was, on his plane ride over here, the fellow sitting next to him was watching that horror movie It, and, well, Henry accidentally ended up watching it too. So then, when he heard about this tour, he asked to go on it in order to face his fears. Ain't much scarier out there than a creepy clown, right? | |||||||||||
| 15 | Ted Lasso & Henry Lasso | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Ted Lasso & Henry Lasso Ted Lasso: Whoa, what is that? Henry Lasso: Thanos' Infinity Gauntlet. Jake gave it to me. Ted Lasso: Oh, snap. Well, that is cool. Who's Jake? Henry Lasso: Mommy's friend. See? It lights up. | |||||||||||
| 16 | Ted Lasso & Leslie Higgins | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Ted Lasso & Leslie Higgins Ted Lasso: I'm sorry. Why is it so bad that a billionaire wants to put together a bunch of superheroes to fight crime? Leslie Higgins: Ooh, Ted, you're thinking of the Justice League. Ted Lasso: God, dang it. Yeah, I am. | |||||||||||
| 17 | Untitled  | Themes | Pleasantville | ||||||||
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| 18 | Untitled | Themes | Pleasantville | ||||||||
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| 19 | Zava | Quotes | Quotes | ||||||||
Zava Zava: Time is a construct like gender, and many of the alphabets. | |||||||||||
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