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THE TICK 1994 Animated Series
  • The Tick: Let's hang ten for justice!

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  • Quotes
    • Arthur
      • Arthur: Not in the face! Not in the face! (Season 1 episode The Tick vs. Arthur's Bank Account)
      • Arthur: My name is Arthur and this is my diversion. (Season 1 episode The Tick vs. Arthur's Bank Account)
    • Crusading Chameleon
      • Crusading Chameleon: Can't... do... plaid! (Season 1 episode The Tick Vs. The Idea Men)
    • Dr. Mung-Mung
      • Dr. Mung-Mung: He weeps for he has but one small tongue with which to taste an entire world.
    • The Human Bullet
      • The Human Bullet: This looks like a job for The Human Bullet - Fire me, boy! (Season 1 episode The Tick Vs. The Idea Men)
    • The Tick
      • The Tick: Oh, what a goofy work is man!
      • The Tick: Ah ha-ha, chess! The ancient contest of wits! Two opponents: mano a mano. Braino a braino. And look! Magnets for ease of travel! You could play chess on the moon!
      • The Tick: Yes, destiny has her hand on my back, and she's pushing!
      • The Tick: Evil, chum, is ever-green!
      • The Tick: Like a great blue salmon of Justice, the mighty Tick courses upstream to the very spawning ground of evil.
      • The Tick: You know, though today was the worst day of my life, I learned many things. First, the world looks a lot different when you're six inches tall and covered with feathers. Second, two heads are definitely not better than one. And finally, you can lay eggs and still feel like a man.
      • The Tick: Thank you for teaching us all that love is thicker than most bodily membranes. But not quite as sticky. And that a heart full of love is better than a body full of people. Merrily, the feet that carried us on the heart's path today will be the feet that soak in the steaming brew of happiness tomorrow.
      • The Tick: I don't know the meaning of the word 'surrender'. Well, I know it, I'm not dumb, just not in this context.
      • The Tick: Ah, savory cheese puffs, made inedible by time and fate.
      • The Tick: Yes, my slimy friend, once again slime does not pay! You can't just coat yourself with artificial mucous and slip through the long fingers of the law. It's wrong and it's gross.
      • The Tick: Mad Nanny! If you harm a hair on this greasy spoon's head, you'll have The Tick to answer to.
      • The Tick: Gravity is a harsh mistress!
      • The Tick: Arthur, you have no historical perspective. Science in those days worked in broad strokes. They got right to the point. Nowadays, it's all just molecule, molecule, molecule. Nothing ever happens big.
      • The Tick: The human mind is a dangerous plaything, boys. When it's used for evil, watch out! But when it's used for good, then things are much nicer.
      • The Tick: Their Achilles' heel is the noogie!
      • The Tick: And my middle name used to be Helping People, The "Helping People" Tick.
      • The Tick: You know, Arthur, it's really been quite a day. On the outside, oh, sure, we were pursued by Swiss Industrial Spies, trapped in the belly of a whale. But what really pursued us? Where were we really trapped? C'mon, Arthur! Get meta with me! What pursued us were our own obsessions. I'm good, you're evil. I'm a superhero, you're a sidekick. I'm a woman, you're a man. What does it all mean? Nothing! And where were we all trapped? I'll tell you where, Arthur! In the belly of Love! Love, Chum, Love.
      • The Tick: He has the moustache of a titan!
      • The Tick: Man! Today is so loopy!
      • The Tick: I'm sure millions of viewers out there are just wondering what it's like to wear the tights of justice. Well, it's tingly and it's uncomfortable, but it gets the job done and, oh, the job of it!
      • The Tick: Villains always have antidotes. They're funny that way.
      • The Tick: And so, may Evil beware and may Good dress warmly and eat lots of fresh vegetables.
      • The Tick: You know, Arthur, when you spend two months riding around on a really big man, you start to learn a few things about yourself. You learn that it is a really great thing to stay on Earth and live in a place that has no arms or legs of its own. And most importantly, Arthur, you learn how to close your eyes and tell yourself that this just isn't happening to me.
      • The Tick: Don't make us bite you in hard-to-reach places!
      • The Tick: Hey! You in the pumps! I say to you, "Stop being bad!"
      • The Tick: Mucal invader, is there no end to your oozing?
      • The Tick: Crime has a bossanova beat. (Season 2 episode Heroes)
      • The Tick: Well, folks, there you have it. A day in the life of a superhero and his sidekick. It's a very long day, the tights are uncomfortable; I think we covered that before. Map light, convenient and essential. A lot of working of villain motifs. Crime has a Bossa Nova beat. Leap before you look. Remember denouement. Other French words: inconvenient, nonessential. oh. I could go on and on. But time's a-wasting and evil's out there making hand-crafted mischief for the swap meet of villainy. And you can't strike a good deal with evil. No matter how much you haggle! We don't need to look for a bargain; goodness is cheap because it's free, and free is as cheap as it gets. Cut! What was that pig about?
      • The Tick: You know, evil comes in many forms, be it a man-eating cow or Joseph Stalin. But you can't let the package hide the pudding. Evil is just plain bad! You don't cotton to it! You gotta smack it on the nose with the rolled up newspaper of goodness! Bad dog! Bad dog!
      • The Tick: And so, Arthur, we learned that gambling is bad and yet in a certain sense, isn't life itself a gamble? You can never be sure of anything. Like who would have thought that dolphins could go bad and that fish were magnetic? Not me, no sir, not me.
      • The Tick: And that's just it, Doc, my mind has always been my Achilles' heel!
      • The Tick: Honk if you love justice!
      • The Tick: Not baked goods, Professor; baked bads!
      • The Tick: I'm about to write you a reality check, unless you would you prefer the cold hard cash of justice. (Season2 episode Heroes)
      • The Tick: Well, once again we find that clowning and anarchy don't mix.
      • The Tick: And, isn't sanity really just a one-trick pony anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking, but when you're good and crazy, oooh, oooh, oooh, the sky is the limit!
      • The Tick: You know, gang, when you're a superhero, you never know where the day will take you. You may find yourself halfway around the world in the shark-infested waters of true-to-life living. Or you may find yourself going down to the store for a lozenge. You can't know, can you? No! You gotta ride that wave, you gotta suck that lozenge! 'Cause if you don't, who will?
      • The Tick: I am mighty! I have a glow you cannot see. I have a heart as big as the moon! As warm as bathwater! We are superheroes, men, we don't have time to be charming! The boots of evil were made for walkin'! We're watching the big picture, friend! We know the score! We are a public service, not glamour boys! Not captains of industry! Keep your vulgar moneys! We are a justice sandwich. No toppings necessary. Living rooms of America, do you catch my drift? Do you dig?
      • The Tick: Oh, look, Arthur, it's a completely rehabilitated villain. She's comfortable with herself. Comfort, commitment, marriage, what do these things have in common? The letter 'C' except for marriage, and if people get all British whenever they get knocked on the head, what do British people get? I know. comatose! Another 'C'.
      • The Tick: Well, once again, my friend, we find that science is a two-headed beast. One head is nice, it gives us aspirin and other modern conveniences. But the other head of science is bad! Oh, beware the other head of science, Arthur! It bites!
      • The Tick: Can't lose my name, it's on all my stationery.
      • The Tick: You're not going crazy! You're going sane in a crazy world!
      • The Tick: I'm about to write you a reality check! Or would you prefer the cold, hard cash of truth?
      • The Tick: Ottoman, there'll be no Justice of the Peace for you; just a big piece of justice!
      • The Tick: Smells like... ambush! (Season 1 episode The Tick vs. The Uncommon Cold)
      • The Tick: Spoon! (Season 1 episode The Tick vs. Arthur's Bank Account)
      • The Tick: We're sworn to protect The City. And we're just going to have to face it: that includes the sewers.
      • The Tick: Destiny, that finely-shaped engine of the universe with the warm hands and the tasteful footwear, pushed Arthur, wings and all, into my path. We were meant to be together, friends to the end. He has a three-pound brain, and it's all smarts!
      • The Tick: Eating kittens is just plain. plain wrong! And no one should do it, ever!
      • The Tick: I'm betting that I'm just abnormal enough to survive.
      • The Tick: So once again, we find that evil of the past seeps into the present like salad dressing through cheap wax paper, mixing memory and desire.
      • The Tick: When a nice clean brain tumbles into the dirty street to lay among the discarded wrappers and spat-out gum wads of wickedness, you can't just pick it up and wash it off with soap and water; you have to think it clean from the inside out!
      • The Tick: Destiny's powerful hand has made the bed of my future, and it's up to me to lie in it. I am destined to be a superhero. To right wrongs, and to pound two-fisted justice into the hearts of evildoers everywhere. And you don't fight destiny! No sir! And, you don't eat crackers in the bed of your future, or you get all... scratchy.
      • The Tick: Let us not forget the lesson that we can learn from this, Arthur, that man was not meant to tamper with the four basic food groups.
      • The Tick: Space aliens have neat stuff! Their space cookies are good, too!
      • The Tick: I'm taking off the kid gloves, and putting on the very mad gloves!
      • The Tick: Nobody mucks around with the Tick's bodily membranes! Prepare for swift justice!
      • The Tick: Yeah, I agree, falling in love with a supervillain is trouble with a capital troub!
      • The Tick: Don't ever try to swim against the mighty tide of justice.
      • The Tick: Let your journey into hugeness teach us all a lesson. Absolute power is a sticky wicket. And, Arthur, chum, you were the stickiest. Don't you get it, good friend? Some of the best things come in small packages. But large things can't! Unless they're inflatable, or require some assembly, or unless they're hearts. Yes, giant, juicy, loving hearts! As big as the moon, but much, much warmer!
      • The Tick: Wait a minute, you! I heard about people like you! Are you saying you don't believe in Santa Claus? And you call yourselves superheroes?
      • The Tick: Spoooooooooooon!
      • The Tick: I hate broccoli, and yet, in a certain sense, I am broccoli.
      • The Tick: Yeah, well, don't count your weasels before they pop, dink!
      • The Tick: Everybody was a baby once, Arthur. Oh, sure, maybe not today, or even yesterday. But once! Babies, chum: tiny, dimpled, fleshy mirrors of our us-ness, that we parents hurl into the future, like leathery footballs of hope! And you've got to get a good spiral on that baby, or evil will make an interception!
      • The Tick: Let's hang ten for justice!
      • The Tick: It's starting to smell a little like danger in here, or heavily-fried food.
      • The Tick: Supermodels usually don't date guys who live in the dirt.
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