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What started out as the ultimate compendium of fake businesses and products now contains many new categories that don't fit the original description... but we just can't bring ourselves to change the name.
Category Groups
Category Group Filter: SPORTS
Category Filter: SPORTS (83)

  • Sports
    • Badger Kicking
        • 
Joke that Bob makes after damaging his Quinlan manny's knee while fighting off what he initially takes for a badger analogue in a cave while hiding out from authorities in Heaven's River, calling it "the international sport of badger kicking".
    • Ballistoboard
        • Doug remembers the June 2033 Ballistoboard tournament trophy behind the bar at Limpy's as havibg been awarded to Morton Lynch, but following Lynch's disappearance, the name becomes Avery Collingsworth. (Chapter 3)
    • Base-game
        • While the school's only ball is being repaired after being run over by Groundskeeper Willie, Principal Skinner offers a few alternative sports, including Dodge-rock, Volley-brick and Base-game. (Season 15 My Big Fat Geek Wedding)
    • Biscuit Ball
        • ALF invents a new sport, played with biscuits (Season 2 episode The Boy Next Door)
    • Blitzball
        • "Let's make it have something to do with the war," suggested Bobby Zane. "Like a blitzkrieg or something."
          "Blitzkrieg," repeated Finny doubtfully.
          "We could figure out some kind of blitzkrieg baseball," I said.
          "We'll call it blitzkrieg ball," said Bobby.
          "Or just blitzball," reflected Finny. "Yes, blitzball."
        • Sport on ALF's home planet Melmac, a game played on ice using fish parts as a ball (Season 2 episode Oh Pretty Woman)
    • Brockian Ultra Cricket
        • Sport. "Many many millions of years ago a race of hyperintelligent pan-dimensional beings (whose physical manifestation in their own pan-dimensional universe is not dissimilar to our own) got so fed up with the constant bickering about the meaning of life which used to interrupt their favourite pastime of Brockian Ultra Cricket (a curious game which involved suddenly hitting people for no readily apparent reason and then running away) that they decided to sit down and solve their problems once and for all."
    • Brockian Ultra-Cricket
        • A peculiar game. "A full set of rules is so massively complicated that the only time they were all bound together in a single volume, they underwent gravitational collapse and became a Black Hole."
    • Centrifugal Bumble-Puppy
        • Obstacle golf, centrifugal bumble-puppy, escalator squash and Riemann-surface tennis are popular activities in Brave New World.
    • Diaper Tennis
        • Sport ALF creates using a diaper for a ball (Season 3 Having My Baby)
    • Didey Ball
        • Sport ALF creates using a diaper for a ball (Season 3 Having My Baby)
    • Dodge-rock
        • While the school's only ball is being repaired after being run over by Groundskeeper Willie, Principal Skinner offers a few alternative sports, including Dodge-rock, Volley-brick and Base-game. (Season 15 My Big Fat Geek Wedding)
    • Dunderball
        • Game somebody mentions when Jim goes around the office soliciting ideas for the upcoming office olympics competition. (Season 2 episode Office Olympics)
    • Escalator Squash
        • Obstacle golf, centrifugal bumble-puppy, escalator squash and Riemann-surface tennis are popular activities in Brave New World.
    • Fartball
        • Sport from Bart's chalkboard gag: "I'm not here on a fartball scholarship." (Season 11 episode Kill the Alligator and Run)
    • Flonkerton
        • The national sport of Icelandic Paper companies, also known as Box of Paper Snowshoe Racing. Event included in the office olympics competition. (Season 2 episode Office Olympics)
        • The sliders find themselves players in The Game, a televised life or death competition involving android dogs and soldiers. (Season 3 episode Rules of the Game)
    • Gerbil Hockey
        • One of ALF's strange sports. Willie: "Well, sure, who else is going to teach him About bouillabaseball, and pasta polo, And other sports involving the hurling Of inappropriate objects? Like gerbil hockey?" (Season 3 Having My Baby)
    • Gleep-glop
        • Kudos the Destroyer: Well done, Columbo. That's right, we watch Columbo. It's on during rain-outs of gleep-glop games. (Season 19 episode Treehouse of Horror XVIII - segment E.T. Go Home)
    • Hallway Soccer
        • Game Matthew and Joe play at work. Dave: "Hey, guys. What's going on? You playing hallway soccer? Trash can basketball? Hey, does this have anything to do with that coffee cup that's been on top of this light fixture the last few days? What do you call this game?" Matthew and Joe: "Who can get the coffee cup off the top of the light fixture." (Season 2 episode The Injury)
    • Hate Ball
        • Game somebody mentions when Jim goes around the office soliciting ideas for the upcoming office olympics competition. (Season 2 episode Office Olympics)
    • Hero Ball
        • Fake sport The Tick mentions: "Where every setback makes the victory that much sweeter." (Season 2 episode Lei-Lo, Ho!)
    • Hoverball
        • When the Essentialists sabotage the weather grid on Risa, Dax's friend Arandis attempts to organize an indoor game of Hoverball. (Season 5 episode Let He Who is Without Sin...)
    • Killball
        • The inner office looked big enough to play killball in. It was dominated by a huge, one-wall picture window that looked west over the homes of the middle class, the dockside warehouses and oil tanks, and Harding Lake itself.
    • Klaneball
        • Sport on Melmac. Just like ice hockey, except ithere's no skating or puck, just hitting each other with sticks. (Season 1 episode I've Got a New Attitude)
    • Latchkum
        • Popular Moclan game played with a little round ball. Don't hold onto it for too long, or long sharp spikes will tear through your hands, which is what happened to Captain Mercer. (Season 1 episode Mad Idolatry)
    • Mindgame
        • On the Egghead world, Quinn's counterpart is a star Mindgame player - some sort of bizarre hybrid of basketball, Family Feud and chess. When Quinn imitates his double, he has to participate in the 27th National Mindgame Finals between the University of California Eggheads and the MIT Beavers. To prepare, he reads the Mindgame Rulebook: How to Play / How to Win by Stephen Hawking. (Season 1 episode Eggheads)
    • Muck Sucking
        • Melmac's biggest sport, apparently very similar to croquet (Season 3 episode Stairway to Heaven)
    • Obstacle Golf
        • Electromagnetic sport that Henry and Lenina play. Obstacle golf, centrifugal bumble-puppy, escalator squash and Riemann-surface tennis are popular activities in Brave New World.
    • Pasta Polo
        • One of ALF's strange sports. Willie: "Well, sure, who else is going to teach him About bouillabaseball, and pasta polo, And other sports involving the hurling Of inappropriate objects? Like gerbil hockey?" (Season 3 Having My Baby)
    • Poopball
        • Sport that doesn't exist. Michael: "Okay, what is it? What can't i guess? I hate, hate, hate being left out. Whether it's not being picked for a team Or being picked for a team and then showing up And realizing that the team doesn't exist Or that the sport doesn't exist. I should have known. Poopball? Oh, man, i know how you feel." (Season 6 episode Gossip)
    • Poquito Ball
        • The national sport of the island of San Montalbano (Season 1 episode A Day at the Races and a Night at the Opera)
    • Riemann-surface Tennis
        • Obstacle golf, centrifugal bumble-puppy, escalator squash and Riemann-surface tennis are popular activities in Brave New World.
    • Roller Skating 2: The New Class
        • New sport the guys create for the X Games. (Season 6 episode The Fabulous Murphy Sisters)
    • Scumball
        • Sport referenced when fans discuss the new sport raking, saying raking could be bigger than scumball. (episode Rakers) Sport mentioned on the news. (Season 2 episode Whacketts)
    • Skleenball
        • Sport ALF used to play back on Melmac that he attempts to recreate with Brian, in which you have to sling your anchovies into your opponent's laundry basket (Season 2 episode Working My Way Back to You)
    • Slap the Bull
        • According to Charley the sheriff (Stephen Tobolowsky), a little game played to make sure your life is not controlled by fear. Turns out to actually involve slapping a real live bull.
    • Space-skiing
        • Space version of skiing. Rick's new friend Tony dies crashing into a tree while space-skiing. (Season 4 episode The Old Man and the Seat)
              • Tag Team Robot Wrestling
                  • Sporting event at the Bi-Mon-Sci-Fi-Con, featuring the mighty robots of Battlestar Galactica versus the gay robots of Star Wars. (Season 10 episode Mayored to the Mob)
              • Tagball
                  • New record added 7/17/2022
                  • Popular sport on Kiley 279. One of the residents of Kiley 279 being held on the Enterprise escapes from sickbay and runs into Uhura in the turbo lift. She mentions tagball, and the greatest tagball game, played between teams the Cone rockets and Boom shield. (Season 1 episode Strange New Worlds)
              • Tail Ball
                  • Sport. Snarf claims that Snarf Oswald still owes him 50 Thunder-dollars from their last tail-ball game. (Season 1 episode Feliner)
              • Talequoits
                  • Bowling. ALF: "Now, the secret to bowling, Or talequoits as it's known in the civilized universe, Is in the wrist action." (Season 3 episode Stop in the Name of Love)
              • Trash Can Basketball
                  • Game Matthew and Joe play at work. Dave: "Hey, guys. What's going on? You playing hallway soccer? Trash can basketball? Hey, does this have anything to do with that coffee cup that's been on top of this light fixture the last few days? What do you call this game?" Matthew and Joe: "Who can get the coffee cup off the top of the light fixture." (Season 2 episode The Injury)
              • Volley-brick
                  • While the school's only ball is being repaired after being run over by Groundskeeper Willie, Principal Skinner offers a few alternative sports, including Dodge-rock, Volley-brick and Base-game. (Season 15 My Big Fat Geek Wedding)

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