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What started out as the ultimate compendium of fake businesses and products now contains many new categories that don't fit the original description... but we just can't bring ourselves to change the name.
Category Groups
Category Group Filter: FOOD AND DRINK
Category Filter: COFFEE (92)

  • Coffee
    • 5th Avenue
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: Going shopping you'll need some fuel. Try this trendy blend while you spend.
    • Bavarian Espresso Hammer
        • Coffee drink Jo orders at Café Diem (Season 3 episode Bad to the Drone)
    • Cafe Latte Supremos
        • Coffee drinks Frasier and Niles order in the pilot episode.
    • Caffalanche
        • New frozen coffee drink at Cafe Nervosa. It comes in three flavors: FrostyCoffee, So Cocoa Cold and Chilla In Vanilla. (Season 9 episode Bla-Z-Boy)
    • Candy Bar Blend Espresso
        • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
    • Central Jolt
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: Loaded with caffeine we don't recommend doing needlepoint after a cup of this joe.
    • Chromium Kona Macchiato
        • Coffee beverage served at Café Diem (Season 1 episode Blink)
    • Coffee Flavored Bevarine
        • Beverage that Mrs. Krabappel offers Superintendent Chalmers. (Season 9 episode The Principal and the Pauper)
    • Cold War Cappuccino
        • Coffee drink Vincent serves on Founders Day (Season 4 episode Founders Day)
    • Colossal
        • Beverage size option at Local coffee shop Don't Spill the Beans (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
    • Dark Coffee
        • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
    • Dharma Initiative Coffee
        • Dharma branded food product. (episodes Namaste, Lighthouse)
    • Double-D Cup Latte
        • Alan Harper: Hey, what's that splattered all over your shirt?
          Charlie Harper: Coffee and breast milk.
          Alan Harper: What happened? Did Starbucks merge with Hooters? Hooterbucks - I'd like a Double-D cup Latte, please.
          (Season 2 episode Yes, Monsignor)
    • Duval Ditchwater
        • Drink that Jason offers Eleanor. It's Midori, Coffee-Mate and ditch water. (Season 4 episode The Answer)
    • Empire Roast
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: Bursting w/flavor & energy. You won't be hanging around after drinking this stuff.
    • FICO-cchino
        • Menu item that Homer orders at IRS Burger, previously known as Krusty Burger. (Season 7 episode Bart the Fink)
    • Fluidiccino
        • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
    • Fraappleasure
        • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
    • Fresh Ground Vinspresso
        • Coffee Vincent serves at Café Diem (Season 2 episode Noche de Sueños)
    • Full Body Latte
        • It's not a latte, but it's one of the menu items listed on the stupid future Starbucks menu.
    • Gentleman's Lattes
        • It's not a latte, but it's one of the menu items listed on the stupid future Starbucks menu.
    • Go-Go Beans Espresso
        • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
    • Good Coffee
        • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
    • Gutless Wonder
        • Coffee drink Frasier and Niles order at Cafe Nervosa - decaf latte with skim milk (Season 1 episode You Can't Tell a Crook by His Cover)
    • Half Caff Zach Braff
        • When Walden offers to get her coffee, drunk Jenny orders Half Caff Zach Braff. (Season 11 episode On Vodka, On Soda, On Blender, On Mixer!)
    • Hays Bros. 100% Columbian Coffee
        • Food product created by the motion picture prop house The Earl Hayes Press.
    • Hays Bros. 100% Columbian Decaffeinated Coffee
        • Fictional coffee product created by the motion picture prop house The Earl Hayes Press.
    • Hot Latte
        • It's not a latte, but it's one of the menu items listed on the stupid future Starbucks menu.
    • Instant Ubik
        • Coffee product. Instant Ubik has all the fresh flavor of just-brewed drip coffee. Your husband will say, Christ, Sally, I used to think your coffee was only so-so, But now, wow! Safe when taken as directed.
    • Java Jive
        • Menu item at the Hippo Club, the speakeasy where Rembrandt sings and Maggie serves drinks on the world where caffeine has been outlawed. (Season 5 episode The Java Jive)
    • Kick-Ass Cappuccino
        • New menu item available at Atomic Comics.
    • Latte-in-a-bowl
        • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
    • Long Island Cream
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: A moovingly rich and creaming coffee straight from the mutter's utter.
    • Lumon Rwandan Ground Coffee
        • As part of Mark's morning routine, he makes coffee for the office. (Season 1 episode Half Loop)
    • Macho
        • Beverage size option at an unnamed coffee shop where Frasier and Niles go looking for a new place to make their regular haunt after Cafe Nervosa hires a guitarist. Server: "I'm afraid we don't have large, sir. We have piccolo, macho, mucho and mucho macho." (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
    • Manhattan Mocha
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: A stimulating brew guaranteed to keep your eyes open until the wee hours.
    • Mayan Delight Organic Dark Roast Coffee
        • Coffee product sold at Shopwell's, visible when Frank and Brenda are climbing the shelves.
    • The Mocha Cappuccino Extreme
        • Beverage thats reserved for gold-class passengers.
    • Mocha Quartet
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: A symphony of flavours blended together to make your day sing.
    • Montreal Morn
        • Coffee that Marge says she's going to brew, the most international coffee in the house, but it turns out there's only Nescafé. (Season 6 episode Homer vs. Patty and Selma)
    • Ms. Liberty Blend
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: A liberating blend, light & sweet. You'll be crying "freedom"! When you taste it.
    • Mucho
        • Beverage size option at an unnamed coffee shop where Frasier and Niles go looking for a new place to make their regular haunt after Cafe Nervosa hires a guitarist. Server: "I'm afraid we don't have large, sir. We have piccolo, macho, mucho and mucho macho." (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
    • Mucho Macho
        • Beverage size option at an unnamed coffee shop where Frasier and Niles go looking for a new place to make their regular haunt after Cafe Nervosa hires a guitarist. Server: "I'm afraid we don't have large, sir. We have piccolo, macho, mucho and mucho macho." (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
    • N.Y. Classico
        • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: The classic coffee taste you'd expect on a classic New York morning.
    • Peruvian Slow Roast
        • Coffee beverage served at Café Diem (Season 1 episode Blink)
    • Piccolo
        • Beverage size option at an unnamed coffee shop where Frasier and Niles go looking for a new place to make their regular haunt after Cafe Nervosa hires a guitarist. Server: "I'm afraid we don't have large, sir. We have piccolo, macho, mucho and mucho macho." (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
    • Quark-tajino
        • Chief asks Quark to come up with a decaffeinated Raktajino for pregnant Kira. Odo: So much for Quark-tajino. (Season 5 episode ...Nor the Battle to the Strong)
                                                      • After General K'orin passes out, Mariner tells Boimler not to worry, they'll get him a hot cup of raktajino and he will be ready to go. (Season 1 episode Envoys)
                                                  • Really Good Coffee
                                                      • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
                                                  • Really Hot Coffee
                                                      • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
                                                  • Semi-colossal
                                                      • Beverage size option at Local coffee shop Don't Spill the Beans (Season 10 episode Farewell, Nervosa)
                                                  • Skinny Sugarsauce Espresso
                                                      • Beverage option listed on the menu in the Starbucks themed guest room at Diane's surprise party (Season 2 episode After the Party)
                                                  • Strong Coffee
                                                      • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
                                                  • Super Coffee
                                                      • Menu item at coffee shop that Guy visits in Free City.
                                                  • Tin Pan Java
                                                      • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: Filtered through the finest skid row hankies we get a brew so thin you'd think it's tea.
                                                  • Triple Campucinne Double Foam Latte
                                                      • Coffee drink Zane orders at Café Diem (Season 3 episode Bad to the Drone)
                                                  • Urban
                                                      • Coffee beverage menu option, as seen on the Central Perk chalkboard menu: Robust and raw this coffee will have you swinging from the lamposts.
                                                  • Venti Nonfat Crap-puccino with Extra Foam
                                                      • Joke Charlie makes about Alan's ex-girlfriend. (Season 3 episode Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts)
                                                  • Victory Coffee
                                                      • Winston and Syme pushed their trays beneath the grille. On to each was dumped swiftly the regulation lunch - a metal pannikin of pinkish-grey stew, a hunk of bread, a cube of cheese, a mug of milkless Victory Coffee, and one saccharine tablet.
                                                  • White Chocolate Unicorn Frappe
                                                      • Coffee drink Annie's mother offers her at the Jitter Bean coffee shop. (Season 2 episode Butcher, Baker, Candlestick Maker)

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