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HAPPY DAYS
1974 TV Series

 Bogus Business Bureau 
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  • Quotes

    • Al & Fonz
      • Al: This is all I have to remember Rosa by.
        Fonz: You dated the women on the dime?

    • Bag
      • Bag: Hi, I'm Bag, wanna go to a Demon party? (Season 1 episode The Deadly Dares)

    • Chachi & Fonz
      • Chachi: I think i'll take the bus back, its been a dream of mine for a long time.
        Fonz: Come on, I know you dream of Natalie Wood.
        Chachi: Yes, but in the dream, I meet her on a bus.

    • Deirdre
      • Deirdre: Oh, this is really nice of you. But I think I ought to tell you I only eat vegetables. It's against my principles to eat murdered animals. (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)

    • Deirdre & Howard
      • Deirdre: I'd like to wash the world's impurity and insincerity from my hands.
        Howard: Uh, Joanie, would you kindly show our guest where we keep our hands sincere?

        (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)
      • Deirdre: I'd like to wash the world's impurity and insincerity from my hands.
        Howard: Uh, Joanie, would you kindly show our guest where we keep our hands sincere?
        (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)

    • Fonz & Chachi
      • Fonz: You treat girls with love, tenderness and respect.
        Chachi: Do you treat all of your girls that way?
        Fonz: Yes, I do and it makes me proud to be an American.

    • Fonz & Heather
      • Fonz: Is your daddy home?
        Heather: No.
        Fonz: When is your daddy coming home?
        Heather: Mommy says when Hell freezes over.

    • Fonz & Richie
      • Fonz: I like to encourage the kid when he shows some get up and go.
        Richie: That's not all that's gettin' up and goin'.

    • Fonzie
      • Fonzie: Sorry, I must have caught a germ in biology. (Season 1 episode Fonzie Drops In)

    • Heather
      • Heather: A boy pulled my hair, I wanted to hit him. But, Mommy always told me when I get mad just say, Pins and needles, needles and pins, it's a happy girl who always grins.

    • Howard & Chachi
      • Howard: But how are you going to support my daughter, how are you going to put food on the table?
        Chachi: Don't worry Mr. C something bound to come along.
        Howard: Yeah, and you'll have to feed that too.

    • Howard & Marion
      • Howard: My feet are exactly 11 inches long, if you don't believe me you can get a ruler and measure them.
        Marion: If I could find a ruler, I wouldn't need your feet.
      • Howard: Why don't you interview your old dad, you could call it interview with a common man.
        Marion: Or you could call it interview with a chubby man.
      • Howard: Marion, get me my hunting rifle.
        Marion: You don't need your rifle, they're musicians.
        Howard: Well then get me my saxophone, what are they doing here?
      • Howard: Marion, the kids are gone, we can do anything we want, we can even watch tv naked.
        Marion: Oh not that again, Howard.

    • Howard, Richie & Marion
      • Howard: And, Richard, I don't want to see her smoking any of those funny cigarettes.
        Richie: Funny cigarettes?
        Marion: Reefers, dear.
        (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)

    • Jenny
      • Jenny: This is the worst summer I've spent since my parents sent me to convent camp!

    • Jenny & Roger
      • Jenny: Wanna get drunk, fool around, have a few kids or any of the above?
        Roger: Jenny, what is the matter with you?
        Jenny: Oh nothing I just had a few minutes to kill before my date.

    • Joanie & Fonz
      • Joanie: That doesn't give you much time to prepare.
        Fonz: Prepare what?
        Joanie: You're curriculm.
        Fonz: What's wrong with the way I'm dressed?

    • Joanie & Jenny
      • Joanie: What if your parents call your house and want to talk to me.
        Jenny: Don't worry Joans, i'll cover for you, I'll tell em you're too drunk to come to the phone.

    • Joanie & Richie
      • Joanie: If you had the keys, how'd they steal the car, mom?
        Richie: Yeah, and when you come to think of it, why'd they steal the car?

    • Joanie, Howard & Richie
      • Joanie: I think she's a beatnik.
        Howard: You don't say.
        Joanie: I'm pretty sure.
        Howard: Richard, I was not expecting you to bring home a stray beatnik.
        Richie: Her name is Deidre, Dad.
        (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)

    • Joanie, Marion & Chachi
      • Joanie: Mom, Chachi and I have finally done something that we've wanted to do for a long time, and we hope you approve.
        Marion: Oh Joanie, oh my littel girl, oh my.
        Joanie: Mom, I don't know what your thinking but its not that
        Chachi: Yeah, its never that.

    • Lady & Howard
      • Lady: You ought to be ashamed, making your wife work nights. If I were your wife I'd drink poison.
        Howard: If you were my wife I'd let you.

    • Lori Beth
      • Lori Beth: No Fonz, I don't believe you. Just like I didn't believe you found $800 in your Wheaties.

    • Lori Beth & Fonz
      • Lori Beth: Potsie stil hasn't told us what his job is.
        Fonz: The guys entitled to privacy, just because he's keeping secrets doesn't mean he's doing something bad, maybe he's singing.
        Lori Beth: Why would he keep that a secret?
        Fonz: I don't know, maybe he's singing for the CIA?

    • Lori Beth & Potsie
      • Lori Beth: She's used to going out with guys who've lived.
        Potsie: I've lived.
        Lori Beth: I mean, recently.

    • Marion & Howard
      • Marion: Oh Howard, can you believe it, our babies having a baby, and one day, that baby will have a baby, and that baby will have a baby, but of course we'll be dead.
        Howard: Marion, can't we just back up a few babies and enjoy the moment.
      • Marion: Oh Howard, I never knew food could be so intoxicating.
        Howard: You never could hold your chicken Marion.
      • Marion: Howard, did you go out in your Jammies?
        Howard: No Sweetheart, I wore a suit and changed at the mailbox.
      • Marion: Richie just hasn't got the appetite that Chuck has.
        Howard: Marion, Argentina hasn't got the appetite that Chuck has.

    • Mr. Squirt
      • Mr. Squirt: Tell you what - you let us keep the bike, and we'll let you keep every bone in your body. (Season 1 episode Knock Around the Block)

    • Officer Kirk & Fonz
      • Officer Kirk: Well, I knew there was a creep in here.
        Fonz: Hey, don't be so hard on yourself, Kirk.

    • Potsie
      • Potsie: Hi, I'm Potsie, how about you and me doing a slow bop and then heading out for the submarine races? (Season 1 episode The Deadly Dares)

    • Potsie & Lori Beth
      • Potsie: Don't tell her i'm dying to meet her, have her bump into me accidently.
        Lori beth: I'll have her hit you with her car.

    • Potsie & Ralph
      • Potsie: did you ever go out with a girl you really wanted to impress and all you could do was make a fool of yourself?
        Ralph: Have you been reading my diary?

    • Richie
      • Richie: I want you to know I respect you as a person. (Season 1 episode The Lemon)
      • Richie: You never can tell what card the old hand of fate's gonna deal you.

    • Richie & Deidre
      • Richie: Is this seat taken?
        Deidre: Is the universe mindless and soulless?
        Richie: It's taken.
        Deirdre: Oh, not yet.
        Richie: Oh. Well, mind if I sit here?
        Deirdre: You're free. Do what you want.
        (Season 1 episode Great Expectations)

    • Richie & Howard
      • Richie: All we had was beer in teeny-weeny little glasses.
        Howard: How many teeny-weeny little glasses did you have?
        Richie: Seventy-two.
        Howard: I think it's time for some teeny-weeny cups of coffee.
      • Richie: No dad I'm going to interview Howdy Doody.
        Howard: You mean you'd rather interview a dummy than me? Don't say what you're thinking, Marion.

    • Richie & Potsie
      • Richie: There must be girls somewhere that think of us as men.
        Potsie: There are, but Joanie's friends are too short.

    • Roger & the Fonz
      • Roger: Did you know that no other mammal other than the primate has thumbs?
        The Fonz: I guess that's why we never see them bowling.
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